Former Toronto Vineyard Pastor Repents


[b]The Toronto Deception

By a former Toronto Vineyard Pastor Paul Gowdy [/b]

It has taken me nine years to actually come to the place where I would write this story. Part of the reason was because I was not fully convinced that it is appropriate to speak out against weaknesses in the body of Christ publicly. Another reason is because it has taken years of soul searching to become convinced that what happened in the Toronto Airport Church was actually all bad or at least more bad than good!

For the past number of years I have called it a mixed blessing. I think James A. Beverly called it this in his book Holy Laughter and the Toronto Blessing 1994. Today I would call it a mixed curse concluding that any individual good that came from this experience is far outweighed by much harm and satanic deception. I suppose that therein has been my dilemma. I have tried to live my life in the fear of the Lord and Jesus told us that the unforgivable sin was the blasphemy of the Holy Spirit. Attributing to Satan what was in fact a work of God. If pressed as to whether or not the Toronto blessing is all God or all Devil I will still be hedgy, but I am convinced that Satan has used this experience to blind people to the historical doctrines of God, to produce fruit in keeping with repentance, to failing to test and discern the spirits and failing to test prophecy.

After three years of being in the thick of the Toronto blessing our Vineyard assembly in Scarborough ( East Toronto) just about self destructed. We devoured one another, with gossip, backstabbing, division, sects criticism etc. After three years of ‘soaking,’ praying for people, shaking, rolling, laughing, roaring, ministering at TACF on their prayer team, leading worship at TACF, preaching at TACF, basically living at TACF we were the most carnal, immature and deceived Christians that I know. I remember saying to my friend and senior pastor at Scarborough Vineyard Church in 1997 that ever since the Toronto Blessing came we have just about fallen to bits! He agreed!

My experience has been that the manifestation of spiritual gifts mentioned in 1st Corinthians 12 was much more common in our assembly, before January 1994 (when the Toronto blessing started.) than during this period of supposed Holy Spirit visitation.

During 1992-1993 when praying for people we would experience what I believe was genuine prophesy, deliverance and much grace and favour from the Lord. After the Toronto Blessing started, all ministry time changed, the only prayers were ‘More Lord MORE ’, the shouting of ‘Fire’ the jerky shaking of the body with the ‘ooh ooh OOH WOOOAAH’ prayer. (I kid you not!)

On January 20th 1994 about 15 people from our church traveled over to Toronto Airport Vineyard in order to listen to Randy Clark, a Vineyard pastor from the USA. John Arnott had called our senior pastor to invite us. He communicated that Randy had been to the Rodney Howard Browne meetings and that the stuff had broke out in his church in the following weeks. John was hoping that something might break out with us too. We were only too happy to travel over. We were a church plant out of the Toronto Airport and we started in 1992. In those days there were three Vineyard Churches in Toronto. One Down Town church, Scarborough vineyard church to the east and the Airport Church. We were one big happy family. Because we were small in number we did special meetings, conferences etc, together.

The year before most of our leadership teams joined and had headed to Nicaragua for a short term missions trip. We had genuine love and fellowship with each other. Since leaving the Vineyard churches I have read a fair bit of analysis from the critics. Some make out that the Toronto Blessing was one huge conspiracy to lead the body of Christ into heresy. Heresy and apostasy I suspect may well be the result, but none of these destinations were intentional. I am honestly convinced that the leaders in the Vineyard churches are genuine born-again Christians who love the Lord, but have fallen into deception. They have not loved the Lord enough to keep His commandments. They have failed to obey the scriptures and have been led astray by our longing for something bigger and brighter and more exciting and dynamic. I am guilty of this sin also. I have preached renewal in Korea, the United Kingdom, the USA and here in Canada. I am genuinely repentant and in writing this story I would ask you the bride and body of Christ to forgive me. Especially the Pentecostal / Charismatic Christians among you, for you are my immediate family theologically. I am an evangelical Christian, I always have been but I do not believe in the cessation of the spiritual gifts at the end of the apostolic era. I believe that it was my evangelical roots (my family are Baptists and I was born again in the Presbyterian Church.) that started to open my eyes to problems with this so called renewal. In hind sight I look back and think how could I have been so blind? I laughed at people acting like dogs and pretending to urinate on the columns of the TACF building. I watched people pretend to be animals, bark, roar, cluck, pretend to fly as if they had wings, perpetually act drunk and sing silly songs. How I thought that any of this was from the Holy Spirit of God amazes me today. It was loud irreverent and blasphemous to the Holy God of the Bible. I suppose in my mind I reasoned that as long as they did not teach any thing in direct violation to scripture then it was what we called the exotic. This is a buzz word for manifestations that could not be justified from a biblical perspective. I was taught from the pulpit that we had two options. The order of the nursery full of life and messy or the order of the graveyard, very orderly but dead! As a young immature pastor I wanted life with mess. I failed to remember that God wants us to become mature and grow up in him. I became disconcerted by the prophetic words that came forth especially one by Carol Arnott in which she had her bride experience where she was taken into the very presence of Jesus and said that the love that she experienced was even better than sex! I was shocked in my spirit and thought how can one compare the love of God with sex? When we suspected that demons were running riot in our services John Arnott would teach that we should ask are they coming or going. If they are leaving then that is ok! John would defend the chaos by saying that we ought not be afraid of being deceived, if we have asked the Holy Spirit to come and fill us then how could Satan come and deceive us? This would make Satan very strong and God very weak! He said that we needed to have more faith in a Big God to protect us than in a Big Devil to deceive us. This sounded very convincing but was totally contrary to scripture for Jesus and Paul and Peter and John all warn us about the power of deceiving spirits and especially so in the last days. Again we did not love God enough to obey His Word and the result was that we opened ourselves up to lying spirits. May God have mercy upon us!

Finally the penny dropped for me as I was rolling around one night ‘drunk in the Spirit’ as we would say. I started singing and as I rolled around the floor the Nursery Rhyme ‘Mary had a little lamb its fleece was white as snow.’ came to mind. I sang this in a mocking spirit and instantly my heart told me this was a demon. Instantly I repented and was in total shock. How could a demon get into me? Did I not love God? Was I not zealous for the things of God? Was I not nuts about Jesus? I knew that an unclean spirit had just manifested through me and I was guilty of great sin. After this experience I stayed away from TACF. I did not go back there any more. I did not possess the conviction to denounce the whole experience but thought that we where failing to pastor the Blessing well enough.

Even after I stopped going over to TACF, I had to pastor the fruit of it. One example was when some of our people returned from a meeting there asking us if we had all received the golden sword of the Lord? I asked them what they were talking about thinking that it was some prophetic reference to the Holy Scriptures but they said, ‘no, its not the Bible, it’s an invisible golden sword that only the really pure can receive. If taken in an unrighteous fashion then the Lord would kill you. But if you are holy enough to receive it then you can wield this sword and it will heal aids, Cancer etc. and bring salvation. How one wielded this sword was by pretending to have this invisible sword in your hand and motioning to strike people with it when in prayer! I thought while even in deception at this time that the TACF had become Looney bins! This was purportedly first received by Carol Arnott and then given to the ones holy enough to receive it! Another thing was the golden fillings in the teeth. We had people in our assembly peeping down one another’s throats looking for the gold fillings that God had placed there to show how much he loved them! In all my time there I only heard one message on repentance given by a visiting speaker from Hong Kong named Jackie Pullinger. It went over like a lead balloon. We were not there to repent, we were there to party in the Lord! After one year into the blessing I spoke out at a pastors meeting and said ‘guys we have shaken, rattled, rolled, laughed cried and bought the tee-shirt. But we have no revival, no salvation, no fruit and no increased evangelism so what’s the deal?’ I was soundly rebuked – who was I to expect to see fruit when the Lord was healing his broken people? We had been legalistic long enough and God was spending this time restoring his wounded and freeing us from legalism I was told not to push the Lord and the harvest would come in his time.’

I knew this was wrong because the Lord had commanded us to go into all the earth and make disciples! Not, that everyone should take a sabbatical for who knows how long, while God does some strange new thing! Ultimately I left over something as controversial as the ordination of women. Personally I believe from scripture that women should not be pastors/ elders in a local assembly. I could be wrong on this and there is much debate in the Church today but that is my conviction and in the Vineyard churches they were ordaining all the pastors wives to co pastor with them. I am certainly for women in ministry but believe that the Elder/ pastor role in a local assembly has been reserved for men. I did not write scripture but God willing I will have the grace from now on to obey it.

So there is my story. I could go on and document much excess, folly, sin and latter day reign teaching that manifest from the prophetic end of this Blessing but others have already done that. We sang about Joel’s army and the billion soul revival as if it were one of the Ten Commandments, and as always it was just around the corner. Next month, next year etc. Jesus said that when the son of man returns will he find faith upon the earth? And if he does not return when he does no flesh would be saved but for the sake of the elect he comes. This is a far cry from the dominionism that is being taught all through the vineyard / prophetic/ spiritual warfare movement. I honestly think that they think they are going to take over the whole world! While in the Vineyard I embraced a life verse from the Apostle Paul the phrase do not go beyond what is written!

To finish I just want to say sorry for the damage, that I have personally done by teaching things that are not correct biblically. I repent before men as I already have before God. I will not excuse my falling into deception. I did not bother to test things when the scriptures commanded us to do so. Everyone who was there when this thing started knows that what I write is true, they would just come to different conclusions especially if they are still promoting the ‘river!’

To those in the river I would say swim out, there are things living in the water that will bite you real good! I love the people of TACF and the Vineyard movement but I think that we have much to answer for and may the Lord open your eyes sooner rather than later. I suspect that when this letter goes online I will get bombarded by emails from both camps, some damning me for still believing in the ministry of the Holy Spirit and still walking in deception and some old friends damning me for exposing dirt or being negative about the Lords anointed! Well, the Lord knows my heart and by his grace he will guide me into all truth as I seek to know Christ and him crucified! If you believe that I walk in sin and error please pray for me that the Lord would forgive me and open my eyes. I will study the word to show my self a work man approved! I would call on all who read this to pray that the Lord would open the eyes of all who have been involved in this deception. Whether leader or follower, we are loved and the Lord is a forgiving God. He says if we confess our sins he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. I believe we are like the church in Laodicea, we think that we are rich, have prospered and need nothing, we do not realise that we are wretched, pitiable, poor, blind and naked. We must take the Counsel of Jesus and buy gold refined in the fire (which is his suffering, not a false spirit!), white garments to clothe our shameful nakedness and salve for our eyes that we might see again. Jesus is calling us to repentance and thank the Lord that he is, for it will lead us to true restoration with our Father! If God has forgiven me and opened my eyes then he can do it for all those caught in deception too. I will finish with a warning from Paul, he says if you think you are standing firm be careful lest you fall.

Sincerely Paul Gowdy.

© 2004-2006. Discernment-Ministries Inc. All Rights Reserved



7 Responses to Former Toronto Vineyard Pastor Repents

  1. timothy says:

    All false doctrines depict God as acting illegally, or unjustly. Satan is the defamer. God never condemns or punishes the innocent for the crimes of others, and pretends the guilty have been punished. This should tell you that the greater deceptions of Satan have yet to be discovered by the deceived churches. The Satanic view of the cross in which people believe that God punished His Son for their sins is the greater deception. If a human judge decided because he loved Ted Bundy so much that he decided to electrocute a chaste school Marm….that judge would be not only disbarred but would be thrown in jail, and according to the Mosaic law that judge would die.
    Proverbs 17:15 says He who condemns the righteous and justifies the wicked, both are an abomination. There is not one place in the bible where it says, or God says that He punished or had wrath on His innocent Son so those that love evil can get off scott free and not have to face justice. It does however state very plainly that God has wrath on those love evil. This is why the atonement only covered sins of ignorance, error and inability. This is the greater deception that has done universally more damage than the obviously insane Toronto blessing movement. To the average person on the street that isn’t even a believer, it is readily apparent to them that the Toronto movement was religious insanity. So, if you are wondering what the great deceptions are in the latter times, the Toronto movement isn’t one of them, though it is a deception. I might also point out that many in the Toronto movement aren’t actually deceived, they know what they are doing.


    • jack smith says:

      There is a serious problem with the Vineyard movement. Since it has become somewhat of a giant, it has neglected to keep clean. It leaves a “bloody trail” of emotional and spiritual harm to many, that goes back for many years. I think it is perfectly correct to make the disgraces public so that the public can be warned. Vineyard clearly is a cult. There have been many of them in the past, and still many remain. When I hear of suicides in the vineyard that is a serious danger sign, and when the information comes through a reputable source, a pastor, and a group of born again pastors. Plus some and many persons who used to go to the Vineyard Columbus, and pastors as well. Many have been harmed in ungodly ways. Personally I have never encountered as ungodly as the leadership by personal experience. They have accused people of things of which they are not guilty, tried to intimidate them with their membership, in some cases the members up and resigned and would not play into their hands. They also teach Yoga, an eastern religion that makes them a New Age Church! It is a cult for sure, and Columbus leader is Rich Nathan. His politics and law background seems to qualify him to do just about anything he wants. This is the only church I have encountered that one has to sign an agreement to support the church, which requires not less than 10% of one’s income, no matter how financially poor they are. See and hear the February 8,2015 sermon by Rich Nathan. He is also against service in the armed forces and when a police officer who was present was questioned about that, his reply was “That’s when I stopped listening.” So beware of the Vineyard, and by all means, “Do NOT drink the cool aid.”


      • Timithos says:

        I have seen the stages that some churches go through, at first their presentation and form of message is designed to gather in as many as they can, then after that those who cannot be fooled for very long “peel off” (usually leave quietly without a word said), and there’s no stopping them from leaving. Other’s who begin to discern the “dark and odd spirit” that begins to form, begin to speak out…This after a while causes the purging of the membership. Then after that, they tend to take…only what I can refer to as “a bugs bunny left turn at Albuquerque”…and change radically. And then the “controlling, intimidating and the policing of the membership” REALLY RAMPS UP. They then begin to engage in over-severity, use shaming, and psychological tactics, to cause feelings of condemnation in “boat rockers”. And they begin to change their message altogether, manner and disposition…and bouts of paranoia, and talking about “spies” and such. It is the typical progression and stages of cultism. They put themselves in the place of God, handing out approval, disapproval or even condemnation. They make merchandise out of people, and think that rather than giving to the poor, one should give to the church instead. The tithe, which was originally for the support of the levitical priests..who were forbidden to work, and only served in the temple, needed to eat. That’s all it was for. Today the “tithe” is a “cash cow” for the churches and church officers.
        If you go into a church and when they pass around the offering plate and you say “I already gave to the poor directly”…what do you think they would say? The churches were never supposed to be a “middle man” between the believer and the poor…the middle man taking out his cut for expenses. if churches did like gas stations do, which is put out a jar and that money goes directly to the poor…instead of being deposited in the churches bank accounts…people would give more.
        There is a church in Pittsburgh PA that went through these stages, first being a largely academic church, then people peeled off. Then church became more radical and only “academic geeky weirdos” and “martinets” remain. The name “charismatic churches” tells you what those churches are all about…charisma.


  2. Lucy says:

    Dear Paul,
    I think that it was very brave to speak out against what happened to you during this movement. I personally believe that God only reveals himself in miracles/ religious experiences in positive ways and would not make anyone look stupid by barking like a dog, singing nursery rhymes etc. There is a dignity in believing in Christ and Pentecostal movements such as these are emotionally and spiritually damaging.

    However, I do have to take umbrage with one thing… no women in ministry… That’s just ridiculous! My father is a priest and both my parents have taught me well and I was always taught that men and women are equal. By denying women places in ministry you are assuming women are not equal and that is a sin, yet in the Bible it says we are all ‘one in Christ.’ You said that the fact you left this movement was not initially because of the dodgy teaching, such as the sword example, but over women in ministry, don’t you think that’s a bit hypocritical?

    If you are going to condemn this movement at least get your facts in order- blasphemy against the holy spirit is a much worse sin that women in ministry. I still hold to this day that as a woman I am completely equal to a man and I do not believe in a God that judges us by our gender. God judges us by our hearts, the difference we make to others lives by loving them, and for how we help make the world a brighter place through demonstrating his love.


    • Rich says:

      You said,”However, I do have to take umbrage with one thing… no women in ministry… That’s just ridiculous!”

      But he said, “I am certainly for women in ministry…”

      Maybe you should read more thoroughly before you post.


  3. Jim says:

    Excellent post. As Jesus said many will come in my name and deceive many. I have since my new birth kept in my heart how the Lord said to Saul, when you were small in your eyes, did you not do well? The indignity manifested by the Toronto revival? Was a clear sign that as humans, we really require a real cleansing to hallow his name.


  4. Lori Morgab says:

    Thank you. What a powerful testimony! I am a woman who ministers to other women and I have seen the fruit of women allowing the men to do the Shepherding and teaching to the assembly. I have also been freed from every wind of doctrine. From the Word of Faith movement, from false teaching. Recognizing that applying and walking in my Fathers instructions, IS resisting the devil AND my joy and deliverance! SPIRIT AND TRUTH.
    There was a great move of the Holy Spirit in that church….in YOU! Ushering you right out the door! Bless you.


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